As indicated by its title, this is a demo. It's a demo from that EP that I couldn't finish, and I decided to include it here because it was the only song that didn't necessarily require screaming so the demo vocals I recorded were pretty decent.
So if it didn't need screaming, then why didn't I just re-record the demo vocals for this release? Well, first, I felt like since this was meant for another EP, it should only be its full self on THAT EP, and second, I tried recording vocals for this a few times, but I just couldn't get it to sound right, so I left the vocals how they were, with annoying mouse click and buzzing from my now-dead laptop in the background!
I'll talk more about the meaning of this song when it is finally released as part of that other EP.
I was kinda tempted to remove this song from this EP when I had gotten more ideas for songs to put on here, but I felt like it made a good transition between 'sBeen a While and The Dead of Night.
Before I move on to the next track, I guess I can talk a little about the development of this EP, since I keep talking so much about the development of that other EP.
Like the other, this EP also started out as 4 tracks, those being 'sBeen a While, I Can't, The Dead of Night, and No More Sleep, but with No More Sleep inteneded to sound completely different. Since it had already been so long since I had initially intended to release this EP, because I was just so caught up workign on other things, I decided to add more tracks. Or rather, I wrote more tracks and decided to put them on because why not.
I guess I should leave the discussion of those tracks for the commentary on those tracks, but basically, the EP went from 4 tracks, to 5, to 6, to 7, and then finally to 8. All in the span of 8 months. Huh. WHAT A COINICIDENCE.
lyrics
When I think of days gone by
And how I just don't want to die
I sometimes feel the need to do
But end up just not wanting to
Bring myself to do the things
That I need to keep on being
Able to afford the right
To work on my stuff all the night
'Cause I just can't seem to
Get my head straightened out
And I just want to get better
But I don't wanna try.
And when I've noticed days have gone
I tell myself that things are fine
Even though I know they're not
But self-assurance is all I've got
I just wish that I could better me,
Get up, do things so I could be
Able to afford the chance
To have a better circumstance
To have a better shot at life,
One not involving wrist to knife-
But I never would do that
'Cause things have not gotten that bad.
I tell myself that all day long,
I've tried to stop tugging my schlong.
Things will be bright if you say they'll be
And I take the time to better me
But I just can't seem to
Get my head straightened out
And I just want to get better
But I don't wanna try.
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